Seriously, that is what I had for dinner... or going to have. I'm having the beer now and will take the bowl of cereal to bed. Where I will eat it with a newborn on my lap, no doubt spilling milk on his head. It's okay, he barely notices me anyway.
Newborns are funny. They sleep all the time and they could give two shits who is feeding them. I guess it is all survival. If someone fed him coconut milk out of a can, he would probably just suck it down and pass out.
I read somewhere that newborns smile "reflex" is thought to be a survival thing. Making them so cute, cute enough to keep them safe. I thought that was 1. totally fucking adorable and second, pretty damn depressing.
Ugh. It's in the air for me. I just can't shake it. I have moments of clarity where I feel like I have my shit together and things are good, then I just get caught up I guess. It's so hard to explain.
Especially to your spouse. You know, the one you are suppose to be able to talk to .
My husband told me he thought it was too bad there were no roller coasters in Seattle- I couldn't for the life of me think of why those words would be strung together like that and then he said "so you could have something fun to do!". If it had not been via text and say, over the phone. I would have hung up.
In person- slap.
He also suggested I "go have a cupcake or something".
I told him it wasn't that simple... I really wanted to say something else, but I was trying to be nice.
He just brushed it off like "ya, how could I ever know what you are going through?".
I suggested he go read a fucking book about it.
See. Nice.
Newborns are funny. They sleep all the time and they could give two shits who is feeding them. I guess it is all survival. If someone fed him coconut milk out of a can, he would probably just suck it down and pass out.
I read somewhere that newborns smile "reflex" is thought to be a survival thing. Making them so cute, cute enough to keep them safe. I thought that was 1. totally fucking adorable and second, pretty damn depressing.
Ugh. It's in the air for me. I just can't shake it. I have moments of clarity where I feel like I have my shit together and things are good, then I just get caught up I guess. It's so hard to explain.
Especially to your spouse. You know, the one you are suppose to be able to talk to .
My husband told me he thought it was too bad there were no roller coasters in Seattle- I couldn't for the life of me think of why those words would be strung together like that and then he said "so you could have something fun to do!". If it had not been via text and say, over the phone. I would have hung up.
In person- slap.
He also suggested I "go have a cupcake or something".
I told him it wasn't that simple... I really wanted to say something else, but I was trying to be nice.
He just brushed it off like "ya, how could I ever know what you are going through?".
I suggested he go read a fucking book about it.
See. Nice.
Heart is breaking for overwhelmed mama.
ReplyDelete>> I have moments of clarity where I feel like I have my shit together and things are good, then I just get caught up I guess. It's so hard to explain. <<
ReplyDeleteWithout being able to explain it myself: I COMPLETELY understand you!!! Really... So, I'm not the only one ... good to know that.
Cheers!
Ahhh, see it's so nice to know we are not the only ones. People say we're not "alone" but I think we are but at LEAST we aren't the only ones. Right?... Sigh...
ReplyDeleteRight. We might be alone, but we are not lonely.
ReplyDeleteHugs from Berlin