I have noticed, as of late (okay, as of always) that it is pretty hard to make a new friend.
Not that I don't like my friends, I do. I have plenty and they are all good ones (well, most of them) and maybe this is all I get but I can't help but notice that when I am out and meet someone interesting, that's where it ends. The meeting. Then poof! we are all on our way and most likely never to meet again.
Why is that? Why is it so weird, taboo or just plain not something that is done, to ask for a number, share email address'? Is this just me? If I were out at a bar and met someone and "clicked" I'd exchange numbers... right, isn't that what we used to do? I say "used to" because when I got out now it is usually to watch my husband play a show, I sit it in the backstage before and usually after the show, never so much as using the public bathroom. Hmm, maybe this is why it is hard for me to meet friends? I am totally my own shrink right now.
I was out with Q, baby and Eddie last week and we met this interesting couple with kids and when we parted ways I said to Eddie "man, I really wanted to ask them for their phone number but thought that might have seemed desperate. Would that have been weird?" and he says "Yes.".
Boo.
Tonight we were at Top Ten Toys, and ran into this guy (with wife and three kids) we didn't speak to the wife who was busy with two of the three and anyway we chatted, he seemed cool, our babies were a week apart and then, we left... as we got in the car I said "SEE! They seemed like people we should hang out with and here we go, leaving and we'll never see them again" and to my surprise, Eddie said "I know, I almost asked for his number but I didn't because I thought it seemed weird".
So why do we feel so paralyzed? I feel this way a lot. I will see a Mom walking down the street with her stroller and her cute (brushed) hair, dresses like she means it, with a bottle hanging out of her pocket and I'll think "we should be friends" but running across the street screaming my email address seems a little crazy.
Aside from crazy though, I am going to think of a way to approach my FBFF ("future best friends forever") because, like it or not, I don't have too many friends that are in my same boat, or even sailing the same sea as me. I am 34, married with two kids with more in my future. I am completely normal, living a completely abnormal life... but aren't we all?
I'm picky, I guess. I don't want the uber anything Mom as my friend. I'm sorry, if you are on every new bandwagon, we will not get along. I don't want to make friends with people that have given up on life... hmm, this is sounding like an ad. So I should stop, or should I keep going? Ha!
When I was pregnant, I checked out the new mom websites. None of the groups seemed to fit me, they were either not in my neighborhood ("need friends, won't travel", kidding I would but these were like far) or seemed way off base in another way. But I have friends that met their BMF ("best mommy friend") at said groups... so maybe I should give that another try?
I feel like I owe it to Elvis to let her grow up with kids. Quattro grew up around adults and as much as I don't regret that at all and it made him who he is which is the most socially adjusted, radical 9 year old, we just have a different life right now. And we will for the next couple of years. We plan to stick around for the next two, then possibly pack it all up and travel with Eddie, take Q out of public school and live a different life. Until then, "hello playdates!" and continual quest for my female better half.
